In the future they’re gonna sell you air and you’re gonna fuckin buy it.
The lorax is a prophecy
i’m just tired and sad and want to makeout with you
If she bites your lip when you’re kissing her , dude you better grab her butt.
1 Bottle of Shampoo = 10 Bottles of Conditioner.
That terrible moment when you have to stare at yourself in the mirror while getting a haircut….
I’m trying to figure out when “oh, it’s midnight” turned into “oh, it’s only midnight”
who wants to hire me as their maid i’m not gonna clean im just gonna wear a cute maid outfit dust like 6 things and bend down a lot
this is still SO FUNNY
i just want to sit on your lap and make out for like eight hours
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